Introducing....
Gracie Marie Stevens...
our little slice of heaven.
Born on her daddy's birthday,
April 10, 2015
6 lbs 5 oz
20 inches long
at 5:26 pm at Madison Memorial
Our little miracle :)
We chose Gracie becuse growing up my grandma and I would always call each other grace and always had the name grace as an inside joke. I would call my grandma on the phone and she would talk to me in grace's voice. Plus I've always thought gracie was a cute name. My moms middle name is marie so that's why we chose marie. And then when she came out- it just fit her perfectly.
This post is probably going to be super de duper long because I just have so many emotions and feelings I want to write down. I want to remember every little itty bitty detail of this perfect day.
So throughout my pregnancy I had gestational diabetes. I was watching every little thing I ate, to make sure my baby wasn't going to be huge. I went in to the Dr. at 39 weeks and they thought it would be best to induce me because they thought Gracie was 8.5 lbs. They checked me and I was dilated to a 4 already woohoo! They showed me the induction schedule and said that the soonest induction they had was April 10th at 6:45 am. I was laughing inside because before I went to my appointment Tanner and I were talking and he was telling me how cool if would be if she came on his birthday. On my way out the door he said, "Just for fun tell them you want to be induced on the 10th and see what they say!" I didn't even ask to be induced on the 10th, but I was after all. Must be meant to be- Gracie and Tanner sharing birthdays :) She's gonna be a daddy's girl for sure.
So...after my appointment on the 8th, I walked out of seasons office feeling so.....EXciteD!!!! It was actually happening- I was going to get to meet my baby girl in 2 DAYS!!! I called Tanner and we were both super ecstatic and couldn't control ourselves. So the next 2 days we spent just he and I. We went to a movie, we played boggle, made cookies and ate popcorn. Stayed up late and talked and laughed, and enjoyed our last 2 days as a family of 2. (and starsky haha)
The night before we went into the hospital, we could hardly sleep. We stayed up talking about how this moment was finally here, and how surreal it felt. Eventually we fell asleep :)
So....5:30 on April 10th came and we got everything ready for the hospital. we dropped starsky off at our friends house, took a family picture just us 3, and we were off.
Here is the last picture I took pregnant! 39 weeks :)
Our last day as a family of 3 :)
We got at the hospital at 6:30, and I was already dilated to a 6! ah! At 6:45 Dr. Merideth broke my water. That was a very interested feeling haha. Felt like I peed my pants x 100. After he broke my water- we just sat, and sat. Tanner and I watched some of our favorite movies. The Proposal, Jack Reacher, and Mrs. Doubtfire. My contractions were about 10 minutes apart after he broke my water. I could feel them, but they weren't unbearable. about 11:00 I was dilated to an 8 and my contractions were pretty unbearable. HALLELUJAH for epidurals! The most amazing thing EVER. seriously. I could hardly feel it, and it kicked in instantly. The best thing about it too, was that I still had a little feeling in my legs! Not full feeling, but I could move them myself. My mother in law was there when Tanner and I were watching movies and she kept saying that she couldn't believe her eyes. After I got the epidural I was laughing, talking, couldn't feel a thing. It was magical!
At 12:00 Dr. Merideth came and checked me again, and I was at a 10! AH! Tanner and I freaked out a little bit. We just looked at each other and thought, wow is this really happening right now? So, 15 minutes later, I started pushing. and pushing. and pushing.
3.5 hours passed.
Still pushing.
Every time Dr. Merideth came by to check our progress, we hadn't gotten anywhere. Gracie was still quite a ways away. I felt like I was pushing my brains out so it was frustrating we weren't getting anywhere.
Dr. Codd came in and talked to us and explained that usually when you've pushed for 2 hours with no progress, they usually recommend C-section. He said that where I'm so small, and had been pushing for 3.5 hours with no progress, a C section was looking like the best option. He told us the risks of a C section, and talked to us about it for a while. He said that since Gracie had been in the birth canal for so long not moving, it wouldn't be good for her to stay in the birth canal for too much longer, and she was guaranteed to have a cone head. Dr. Merideth said he was going to let me bear down for 30 more minutes, and then we'd get started.
The only thing I could think of was that my baby was HHHUUUGGGEEE. haha. If she wasn't budging at all, tanner and I thought for sure she was like 9 lbs.
So they got me all prepped for the C-section, and took Tanner to go get his fancy gown on. They wheeled me down to surgery, and I was so out of it. I remember passing Tanners mom, dad, and sister and them all just staring at me. Tanner's mom tried to talk to me, but I felt like I was floating. I was sooo out of it it was weird. They got me in the room, and my body felt like jello. They tried moving me onto the surgical table, and I felt like a beached whale. It was the weirdest feeling. It took like 6 of them to transfer me to their table. They strapped my arms down, and put a blue sheet up in front of my head so I couldn't feel anything. At this point I didn't know where Tanner was and I remember feeling really scared. "Where was TanneR?" "Is my baby ok?" "Is Tanner going to be in here with me" were a few things running through my head. Luckily the anesthesiologist was by me the whole time before they started. He was there to make sure I felt comfortable, and to make sure I didn't feel any pain. He was a lifesaver before Tanner got there.
After what seemed like an eternity, I finally saw Tanner. He was dressed in blue like the rest of them, and I almost didn't recognize him haha. He came over to me and kissed me on the forehead. He held my hand, Dr. Codd and Dr. Merideth said they were doing a test to make sure I couldn't feel anything before they got started. I remember looking up at the clock and it was 4:49 pm. They told me that I was going to feel a lot of pressure, and tugging, and pulling but I shouldn't feel any pain.
and........then the journey began!
I didn't really feel anything. There were a few times where I could feel a lot of weird sensations. Just like they said- tugging. But no pain. I remember feeling so isolated and confused. I've always been super sensitive to anesthesia- even the littlest amounts. So I was super out of it. I remember my nose would constantly be itching. I'm sure the poor anesthesiologist loved scratching my nose 50% of the time. hahaha. Tanner was really into the C-section. Every time I looked up at him he was looking over the sheet they had put up. It was a weird feeling for me. I would grunt to try and get Tanner's attention but he was sooo into it so i just layed there. layed there and layed there totally out of it. There was so much beeping going on, and so many people in the surgical room. I think there was probably like 10. Tanner said that Gracie was so far down the birth canal, that Dr. Merideth had to stick his whole forearm inside me to grab her head to get it out. Tanner said that they were talking about having one hand go up me, and one hand go in my stomach to wedge her out. Luckily they didn't have to do that. Apparently when they had cut me open, they drained 2 more liters of my water. NO WONDER MY STOMACH WAS SO HARD!!! hahaha. I had a total of 3 L of fluid in me...ah. They said thats very rare haha. But explains why my stomach was super hard
Tanner wanted to cut the cord, but they wouldn't let him past the blue sheet so he couldn't. But...Finally after about a half hour of staring at a blue sheet, and feeling lots of tugging,
there she was.
our little miracle.
They held her up over the sheet so I could see her, and she had a pretty bad cone-head. Tears started streaming down my face. After a few seconds they took her, and cleaned her up. They also took Tanner. I was SO confused by this point. I was just laying there getting stitched up, and my husband and my baby were who knows where. Well, it turns out they all knew it was Tanner's birthday, so they let Tanner give Gracie her first bath. Tan said he just watched the nurse do it, but would help here and there. Such a special bonding experience. Tanner got to put her cute little hat on, and then after what seemed like an ETERNITY, Tanner comes around the sheet holding our baby girl. His eyes were swollen with tears, and tears started streaming down my face too. It was the most beautiful sight- seeing my husband hold our perfect little daughter, with tears in his eyes. The moment we'd been waiting for for 3 years was finally here!! It was so surreal.
After they stitched me up they wheeled me to the recovery room, and did a bunch of things I don't even remember. I guess I was in that room for like 3 hours, but my meds had me all wacko. Everytime the nurses would ask me something, It took me like a minute to respond haha. I was still along in the room- without Tanner or my child. after a while, Tanner comes in the room holding Gracie. she was just perfection. They did some things on her, and I still hadn't gotten to hold her. nor did I know how much she weighed or anything. So finally they wheeled me to the family baby unit and I got to hold my baby girl for the first time.... I was so out of it still so I don't think it had registered yet that I was holding my baby girl haha.
But...I just loved her. Her little features were so tiny and perfect in our eyes. I don't really remember the whole rest of the night, except that everytime I looked over at Tanner he was holding Gracie. I just love this picture below....because tanner has tears in his eyes, Gracie's eyes are open, and they share the same birthday. so special.
Tanner spent the night there with me the first night, and the nurses wanted me to do skin to skin with Gracie all night long. They came in every 2-3 hours to check on us. So sleep? nah. haha who needs sleep. I just stared at Gracie for hours that night. Stared at her little features. Pretty sure she has my nose, Tanners mouth and lips, and her eyes? I'm not sure. She has my chubby cheeks, and Tanners ears :) But either way- we think she is perfect and couldn't ask for anything more. The first 2 nights after she was born, she slept through the night without waking up once...haha so she's been a champ from the very beginning :)
We ended up staying in the hospital for 3 more days. Gracie was a champ in the hospital and didn't get jaundice, or anything that caused her to stay longer. They wanted to keep an eye on me and my incision and help with breastfeeding. So we stayed until monday. Ugh I felt like I was in a dungeon haha. I had a total of 10 nurses during my stay there, and I was so overwhelmed with everyone's different opinions about everything. By sunday I just wanted to go home so bad and figure everything out on my own haha.
We had lots of visitors while we were there though- Tanners family came every day, Lexi and Jimmy came, Brett and Megan, Nick and Kenzie, and Aj and Kacy all came. On sunday the little old man that I took care of, Wally came hobbling up to the hospital. He got to our room and was just exhausted. I thought he was going to pass out! cute old man. he adored Gracie, it was cute to watch. that same day, the other old man and his girlfriend came to the hospital as well. They think of Gracie as their granddaughter, and it is so cute. For heavens sake he made her crib, and they have done so much for her. They also brought me cute flowers.
I got a delivery of random flowers, and I thought maybe they were from my mom and dad in Israel or something but they were from my oldest brother Jaxon. so sweet. funny story- I was texting Jax telling him to facetime me and he responded, give me 10 minutes. So literally 10 minutes later, I hear a knock on the door and there walks in Jax- with 3 of his kids. Meant the world to me! His wife didn't even know that he had driven down to see me. But man! so sweet of him! His kids adored Gracie, and just wanted to squeeze her little cheeks.
Flowers from Jax and Don & Ellie :)
finally after 4 days of being in the hospital we were on our way home!!!
Gracie weighed 5 lbs. 13 oz when we took her home.
I was so ready to get out of there haha.
Here's some more random pics we took in the hospital:
I LOOOVEEE this picture. so sincere.
Proud Grandma
First time in her carseat!
This last picture above is my MOST favorite picture from the hospital. The 2nd and 3rd nights in the hospital tanner ended up going home so that he could get some sleep and be more helpful to me when he got back haha. I had fallen asleep for an hour or so in the middle of the night, I look over at Gracie in her cute bassinet, and this was her look. She was staring right at me through the glass, with that huge binky in her mouth, wide eyes, just staring at me. It's like she knows I'm her mom. it melted my heart and actually brought me to tears! Love my Gracie girl.
We feel so incredibly blessed to have Gracie here, so healthy and so strong. She really is a little slice of heaven, and we are grateful that the Lord trusts us enough with one of his sweet spirits!! We love her more than words can describe. I love the bond that she and her daddy already share. She loves him. Everytime he talks- she'll turn her head to look for him.
WE LOVE YOU GRACIE!!!
Thanks for making our lives feel complete.