Gracie is 3! Gender Reveal

my baby girl needs to stop growing up. GOLL time is going by fast. We found out the gender of our baby close to gracie and tanner's bday so we threw a triple party! bday party for gracie, bday party for tanner, and gender reveal party for baby!

Gracie got a new dot dot smile dress, some sparkly light up shoes, and a bubble blower.
enjoy the pics :)

so for our gender reveal party, we had 2 bowls where people could guess if the baby had nuts, or no nuts. hahahahahahahaha.

 I thought it was hilarious!!! so clever

 so long story short, my sister had all our friends go around in a circle and tell us if they thought it was a boy or a girl. I had a pie I was hiding from tanner, when it was his turn i squished it on his face. At this time Gracie was super attached to her dad. she got SO SAD and SO MAD at me for doing that to her dad. she started screaming and came up to me yelling at me: "why did you do that to my dad! stop it mom!"

 It was a fun party!!!!!

ITS A BOY!!!! not what we were expecting at all. we both thought it was another girl!

18 weeks prego.

16 weeks!

We've made it to 16 weeks. I remember when I was pregnant with Tuff, everyone I talked to about being pregnant reassured me I was in the clear. It was only days after that that I lost him. So really I don't feel like there's ever a time you're "in the safe", because anything can happen. But I remember feeling SO GRATEFUL  to have made it this far. The hemorrhage was still there but was going down with each visit.  keep on keepin' on :)

and of course a belly pic to remember.

Feb-March 2018

Gracie had a dance recital with her 2 best friends, charlotte and nicolette. She was SO CUTE and did SO GOOD. I was so proud of her. she definitely had her own personality and didn't want to follow directions. she had the whole crowd laughing hahaha.

she loved being in dance with her friends!!

 you can always find gracie in the kitchen dancing her heart out.

 fun valentines hair!!!1

we put gracie in gymnastics and took her out of dance class. We wanted to build up her muscle and see what would be better for her. so far she loves gymnastics! she loves the trampoline and following her teacher. I looked dup one day and she was saying cheese in-between her legs. haha.

just a random day swimming with my gal.

 and of course random pics i love.

12 weeks pregnant. belly starting to pop!

this is the ultrasound at 12ish weeks. The hemorrhage is the black area next to the baby. It had gone down significantly. YAY!!!!!

BABY?

BABY?

Tan and I decided in Nov 2017 we wanted to start trying for another babe. Because of our history with getting pregnant in the past, we set our expectations really low for this one. If there's one thing I've learned in my life, it is to set expectations low for everything. then when something good happens I'm that much more excited about it!  So that's kinda what we did with this babe. it only took us 2 months with this one, and we didn't stress about it, we did what came naturally, and we just took each day one day at a time. I remember I was about a week late but didn't want to psych myself out by taking several tests followed by disappointment and unhealthy thoughts. In the past you would've caught me taking 2 tests a day, a week early. I was that obsessed with getting pregnant. But with this one I just tried not to stress out or freak out about it.

One day out of the blue I decided to test and there she be!

Tanner and I had a lunch date that day so I brought them with me and just whipped them out. haha. we just kinda kept things low key. Still excited, but kept expectations low in case we did lose this baby. I'm SO GLAD we had that attitude. SO GLAD. I remember when I was pregnant with one of my past babies and lost it, the nurses always told me I needed to just stop stressing about it and that it would happen. oh man during that time i was SO MAD at the nurses. I wanted to slap em haha. But now that that's in the past I really believe they are right. We were too stressed and focused on getting pregnant that we struggled to enjoy the day to day things.

so here we go!!! I found out I was prego on Jan 2 2018.

 In this pic I was about 8 weeks, first dr. appointment.

At my first ultrasound appointment I found out I had a huge subchoreonnic hemmorage. My Dr. said they are common, but we have to keep a close watch from the beginning. not gonna lie, I got in the car afterwards and just bawled. All the bad things consumed my thoughts. thinks like "here we go again. why can't i just have a normal pregnancy. I don't want to lose this baby. I hope i miscarry sooner than later, etc". obviously not healthy thoughts but given my past and my babies and pregnancies, they were valid thoughts.  My Dr. said that a lot of women have these types of hemorrhages, some go away on their own, others get bigger and get inside the babies sac, causing a miscarriage. So she basically told me there was a 50/50 chance with this baby. ugh talk about an anxiety attack. not really but close. I called my brother over to give me a blessing and that was much needed. I felt really calm afterwards. I still had bouts of anxiety here and there, but I went in often to check on the baby to calm my nerves.

GOOD VIBES ALL THE WAY :)

Janary 2018! NEW YEAR!

It's a NEW YEAR! I'm sitting down and blogging about months at a time and I'm in AWE and SHOCK at how fast time is going. I'm trying to soak in all I can with my Gracie Girl. I just love her. she test my patience SO MUCH but i LOVE the days we have just me and her.
January was a month full of painting nails, dates with grandpa, cooking with mom, mustaches in the kitchen,  movies with friends, ice castles, painting nails, and just loving life.